Thursday, February 10, 2011

Beloit List Part Three of Three

51. Food has always been irradiated.


52. There have always been women priests in the Anglican Church.


53. J.R. Ewing has always been dead and gone. Hasn’t he?


54. The historic bridge at Mostar in Bosnia has always been a copy.
55. Rock bands have always played at presidential inaugural parties.


56. They may have assumed that parents’ complaints about Black Monday had to do with punk rockers from L.A., not Wall Street.


57. A purple dinosaur has always supplanted Barney Google and Barney Fife.

58. Beethoven has always been a dog.


59. By the time their folks might have noticed Coca Cola’s new Tab Clear, it was gone.


60. Walmart has never sold handguns over the counter in the lower 48.

61. Presidential appointees have always been required to be more precise about paying their nannies’ withholding tax, or else.


62. Having hundreds of cable channels but nothing to watch has always been routine.


63. Their parents’ favorite TV sitcoms have always been showing up as movies.


64. The U.S, Canada, and Mexico have always agreed to trade freely.

65. They first met Michelangelo when he was just a computer virus.

66. Galileo is forgiven and welcome back into the Roman Catholic Church.


67. Ruth Bader Ginsburg has always sat on the Supreme Court.


68.They have never worried about a Russian missile strike on the U.S.

69. The Post Office has always been going broke.


70. The artist formerly known as Snoop Doggy Dogg has always been rapping.


71. The nation has never approved of the job Congress is doing.


72. One way or another, “It’s the economy, stupid” and always has been.

73. Silicone-gel breast implants have always been regulated.

74. They’ve always been able to blast off with the Sci-Fi Channel.

75. Honda has always been a major competitor on Memorial Day at Indianapolis.

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